Friday, February 11, 2011

People Suck.

Last night, I was forced to make a foray into the jungle they call Wal-Mart. I'm never crazy about a trip to the big box for a variety of reasons, but the Thursday crowd was what got me. No one's ever accused me of being a liker of people, and my observations were not to the contrary. You see, if this trip taught me anything, it's this: People suck.

So I'm walking around the store, minding my own business, after moving twelve shopping baskets out of the parking space so I could fit, and I decide to stop by McDonald's (also not a fan) for a drink. And right there, at the entrance, some douche has left a half eaten candy bar. A. Twenty bucks says that they did not pay for that candy bar, and B. The trash can is four God damned feet away! If you're gonna steal a candy bar, at least have the decency to eat the whole thing and throw away your trash! But I continue shopping, sifting through the throngs of fatasses, and stepping over patrons who decide to lie down and read in the middle of aisles. And then, as I walk out the exit, I pass a young woman as she takes a puff of her cigarette, blows the smoke into the face of her six month old, hides the lit cigarette in her purse to sneak past the 80-year-old greeter, and then finishes it inside the store. What the Hell?! How old are you? Almost every person I saw in the store was in some way being obnoxious and scuzzy. What do these people get from doing these things? Are they that much happier than they would be if they were classy?

The more I think about it, the more I realize: this is America. These assholes are the epitome of modern Americana. They're the people who make the other 307,006,549 of us look like streetwalking roadwhores to Europeans. I think, I don't have any friends like that, no one I know is that trashy... but then I realize that those people must have friends and family too. Do their friends find them trashy? Are their friends also trashy?

Which makes me wonder: Are people we know trashy when we're not looking?

The thought of this horrifies me, but it's worth consideration. Does my health teacher litter when no one's there to see him? Does my great aunt leave shopping carts in the middle of the parking lot? My random acquaintances, cafeteria ladies, friendly neighborhood sex offenders, even my close friends, are they "those people" when I'm not around?

I'm not sure if this is a question of etiquette or integrity, but it's certainly not one to be dismissed. This hits close to home; that chick who snuck her smoke in is someone's mom. Does my mother steal chocolate bars and smoke in Wal-Mart? Or worse, do I do such disgusting things? Do people see me and mentally call me out for being sleazy? This menial Thursday mac and cheese run has completely changed my world view. I will forever be concerned with how gross or not gross everything I do is. I'll think twice before I leave straw wrappers on the drink counter or not clean up a movie theatre spill.

Maybe in this scenario, a negative view is the best one. Maybe if we all hated people as much as I do, we'd do our part to make the world better. And that's the way we get down...

In A Hick Town.

Comments